We Need to Talk
A Survival Guide for Tough Conversations
Too few teams truly embrace healthy conflict—the secret to building great products—so Joshua Graves is writing a book that will teach you how to leverage it with practical, equitable, non-prescriptive methods to craft the best possible version of your product, your team, and even yourself.
This book will give you tools you can use immediately in your next tough conversation. Whether you’re having hard conversations with your boss about a crucial decision, a teammate who makes offensive jokes, or someone who’s underperforming on a team, this book will take the fear out of engaging in conflict.
Too few teams truly embrace healthy conflict—the secret to building great products—so Joshua Graves is writing a book that will teach you how to leverage it with practical, equitable, non-prescriptive methods to craft the best possible version of your product, your team, and even yourself.
This book will give you tools you can use immediately in your next tough conversation. Whether you’re having hard conversations with your boss about a crucial decision, a teammate who makes offensive jokes, or someone who’s underperforming on a team, this book will take the fear out of engaging in conflict.
Table of Contents
Chapter 1: Introduction
Chapter 2: Before you Begin
Chapter 3: Having the Conversation
Chapter 4: How to Have Conflict on Remote Teams
Chapter 5: When People Yell
Chapter 6: When People Lie/Gaslight
Chapter 7: When People Make Offensive Jokes/Comments
Chapter 8: When they Make Ludicrous Requests
Chapter 9: When they Don’t Respect Your Boundaries
Chapter 10: Conflict with Your Boss
Chapter 11: Sticking to Your Guns When Someone’s Being Pushy
Chapter 12: Navigating Cultural Dynamics
Chapter 13: Talking to Underperformers
Chapter 14: Addressing Pay Inequality
Chapter 15: How to Know if You Should Avoid a Conversation
Chapter 16: How to Disagree and Commit
Chapter 17: How to Act When You Don’t Have Time to Prepare
Chapter 18: When You’re Receiving Tough Feedback
Chapter 19: How to Build Psychological Safety on Your Team
Chapter 20: Mediating with Multiple People
Chapter 21: Addressing People who Hate Change
Chapter 22: Wrap-up
Chapter 23: Resources
